Its unique - Its me

Summer holiday

2008-08-16T17:55:00.002+08:00

No longer will you tease me, nymph.
With fruits ripe for picking.
I savour the gentle bouquet.
Luxiurate in this restfulness.
With my books and mood music.
I wile my time away.

The breeze beckons.
I am alive again.

I don't get me

2008-08-14T23:05:00.002+08:00

Should I have told you?
You asked, so I answered.
I don't know.

I was vague.
I'll admit as much.
Some things are not meant to be.

It took me by surprise.
To tell the truth.
And remained in my mind.

We'll just see how it goes.

Summer madness

2008-07-26T17:08:00.000+08:00

Summer madness.
The heat comes on and it makes you do crazy things.

Sales are on.
Clothes are off.
It all goes on into the night.

Ice, ice baby.
Deliciously down its slippery path.
Leaving you shivering in its wake.

Sweet relief.

Hello Gorgeous

2008-06-01T23:01:00.003+08:00

Hello Gorgeous.
I've missed you.
Your lame humour too.
It has been hard.
You not around to talk to at times.
It wasn't your fault.

Hello Gorgeous.
I adore you.
You of three I hold dear.
Your warm hands that calm me.
That voice that soothes me, amuse me.
Those ears that take care of me.

Hello Gorgeous.
I used to love you.
Bet you didn't know that.
Or ever will.
Took me a year to get over you.
You were my type.

Hello Gorgeous.
I need you.
Sweeping through my hair.
Carressing my skin.
Giving me that glow; a sparkle in my eye.
You dance with me and I feel free.

Hello Gorgeous.
I welcome you.
Your innocent expressions of love.
The darkness beckons.
I find rest.
Secure in your arms; I fall asleep.

Esther Greenwood Day

2008-05-20T22:52:00.003+08:00

Today was an Esther Greenwood day.

This overwhelming sense
Of melancholy just washed over me.
And the coat of blue has yet to dry.
It would mean so much to me
If you stayed and waited awhile.
Paint splatters, drips and drops.
Time helps each shade to fade but:-
Only a case of you will wash it all away.

Naked desperation clothed her blemished face. Instinctively, she buried her useless hands in her hair. It took away her confusion at what to do. Not in the larger sense, no, she was not that lucky. The force of momentum that used to propel her forward was lost. Glass had just cracked and it was gone in that instant. She truly did not know what to do; in the most basic sense. It was as if she had to learn everything again. Her unsteady hands trembled on their own violation. They have been doing that a lot lately. She was a bloody mess; one worthy of the bodies that were thrown on the tracks. A crude method, no doubt. Yet one so primitive, it exposed all without meaning to in the most spectacular wreck of a manner. A captivating wreck, you could not tear your eyes from, when all you wanted to do was turn away.

So close

2008-05-08T14:54:00.005+08:00

Warning: This is a gushing, all-is-right-with-the-world post. If you're like my normal self, please turn away or keep eye-rolling to a minimum. Thank you.

Listening to the Enchanted soundtrack somehow puts me in a good mood. That-as in mood music, coupled with good friends make for a pretty good life. Add in being given a Mars bar for no particular reason and you get chocolate goodness.

It makes up for my accident prone day yesterday. I nearly tripped when my foot was entwined around the leg of my chair. Shortly after, I got a paper cut on my middle left finger. Thankfully, I had left a plaster in my spectacle case for goodness how long. I only remembered it when I was making my way down the slope to head over to the main library. So, I stopped, took it out and plastered my finger. The weight of the laptop in my bag must have thrown me off because somehow I found myself walking towards the branch right ahead of me. In order to avoid hitting my head (even though I'm short enough to pass through but I would have gone off the path), I swerved only to bang my left hand against the concrete railing fixture. Ouch! At least, I could go around showing everyone the middle finger without creating too much offence. After all, I could always say I was showing them my paper cut!

That sure was a hell of a day. It got better after though when I met Rai for dinner. We both were so exhausted that when we first sat down, we just slumped and stared into space together like a couple of idiots. Funnily enough, that was quite natural behaviour. Our moods and thoughts have always been on the same wavelength. She can tell when I'm upset just over sms and we both say the same thing at the same time alot. Psych!

Alright, I lied in the beginning. But I am feeling slightly euphoric. My friends are bloody fantastic people and I am really glad to have them. They lighten my mood just with their presence, jibes, insults and mindless chatter. Thank God for them!

All Broke Up

2008-04-19T16:29:00.005+08:00

In pieces, across the floor.
Scattered with the breeze.
A puzzle left incomplete.
I lay curled to my knees.

The pieces didn't fit.
They never did.
At odds yet at work.
A striking thing indeed.

Something was lost.
Never at ease.
Who knew what it was?
Not even me.

I falter and pause.
My hand in mid air.
Gently, it came down.
In a twist of despair.

Fingers uncurled.
The hand went limp.
Exposed and afraid.
It trembled with care.

Blue veins screamed out.
Seeking relief.
The cold floor was strength.
As some would believe.

To not feel a thing.
To not try and bear.
The burdens there were.
Which needed to be shared.

Blood was demanded.
Crimson to be shed.
The tears came down.
While I shook my head.

Misty White Cliffs

2008-03-17T04:02:00.002+08:00

It was the last sight for many soldiers as they left their beloved country. As they sailed away, it perhaps comforted them to see the white cliffs of Dover as it slowly faded away in the distance.

Cut!

Sounds like a scene out of an epic movie right? Too bad it wasn't like that when we got there. It rained and a mist rolled in. You could barely make out mist from cliff. What was interesting though, was that there were residences among the cliffs. During the war, secret tunnels were dug into the cliffs. As you can probably tell, the white cliffs were a sitting duck when it came to air raids.

Si Min and I strolled along the pier as rain dripped down on us. There were fishermen nearby, trying their luck. The sea was relatively calm as it bobbed slightly with the receeding tides. You could spot about four lighthouses in total along the coastline. As we made our way, we saw this large cruise ship sailing in our direction. For a moment, you could almost imagine a jaws-like sequence happening but Dover is just too peaceful.

We talked about how we wouldn't mind spending our holiday in Dover. Many Victorians used to have their summer there after all, till it became a bore. The pace of life was definitely in between languid to non-existent. It would be quite lovely though- strolling on the pier, walking along the beach, reading a book or just sitting at a cafe.

When we got back to the car and warmth, it couldn't start! The engine had just died. As we waited for help to arrive, I decided to walk along the beach. Odd fact about the beach- it isn't made up of sand but small coloured pebbles. Littered all over the coast were deep purple shells, a stunning sight I must say!

Si Min joined me a little later on and we explored the beach. She had a grand time climbing the steep incline as the rocks skittered down. We picked up a few rocks and stones before heading down to the waves. The oddest thought of just walking into the sea popped into my head.

As part of a dare, I got Si Min to dip part of her foot into the chilly water. She whined throughout but did it anyway. Using that as an excuse , I decided to join her. Alright, Ill admit that I just could not pass up the opportunity. Who goes to the beach and not go into the water after all? Plus, I wanted the experience. Stripping off my shoes and socks, I walked in a little as the tides came in. As the waters swum up to about above ankle-high, I started to feel my feet freeze. It was a very cool feeling- figurative and literally. The hard part was putting on my shoes in the shifting rocks.

We quickly ran back when the toll truck came. The problem apparently lay with my dad pumping in petrol instead of diesel into the car. After a quick tow, the oil was pumped out in a workshop and we were on our way again. Some big adventure huh?

Locked out

2008-03-15T09:16:00.005+08:00

The darnest thing just happened!

I was working on the computer; editing some stuff when I heard this knocking sound. So, I peeped out and there was this pretty hot guy in a tux banging on the door opposite ours. After some time, he gave up and walked off. A brief interlude later, he came back again and I could hear him knocking.

It was about then that I realised I needed to pop over to my parents' room to get the charger for the camera battery. After a quick look to check that there was nobody around, I left my room with my dad's key in tow. Imagine my surprise when I found the hot tux sitting by our door! Flashing a quick smile at him and silently cursing myself for looking so unglam, I slipped into my parents' room. Trying as silently as I could, I rummaged around looking for it. Of course, just the sound from opening the door alone roused my mum.

A few knocks and bangs later, I managed to locate the charger and slipped out again. The tux was still there, only this time he was knocking on his door again. As he turned to glance at me, I found myself making small talk- of all the times to do so! "Forgot your key?" I asked with an amused smile. He muttered something along the lines of being locked out. At that very moment- when those words had slipped out of my mouth, I realised something really stupid.

I had forgotten my own room key! While I had been so careful to remember to bring along my dad's key, I had neglected my own and my handphone. I felt extremely dumb the moment the words flew out as the realisation of what I had done or did not do, dawned on me. The full impact just hit me from nowhere; like a blow from the dark.

Left with no other option, I joined him in knocking urgently on our respective doors. Alas, the telly was blaring Kylie Minogue in "Can't Get You Out of My Head" and I had left Si Min in pretty deep slumber. Seeing as I had a room key and a charger in hand, I decided that the next best course of action would be to return to my dad's room. I tried using my dad's phone to sms Si Min but it was unfortunately out of network range. I tried knocking on our door again to no avail. The tux observed all this impassively. We each took turns knocking on our doors. Rat-a-tat-tat and then rat-a-tat-tat. Nothing.

Then suddenly, a door opened. Hot tux's not-so-hot friend probably had a change of heart or just woke up. As I continued on knocking, the tux probably peeped out to check on me. Why I would think that? He popped his head out several times as if he wanted to say something. Perhaps he wanted me to stop knocking but I'm pretty sure he understod my predicament eh? Giving up after a valiant effort of keeping desperation at bay, I headed back to my mum's room to spend the night there.

By this time, my mum was more or less half awake. Laying my head on the bed, I told her the sad tale of being locked out due to my own incompetence. Frankly, it quite depressed me. She then offered the use of her phone. Seeing that I had nothing to lose, I borrowed it and finally managed to sms Si Min. My one hope of getting back clung to the slim chance that she would be awakened by her phone lying nearby.

As i poked my head gingerly out, I was greeted with the sight of an open door. The calvary had been awakened! I zipped out and was barely in when hot tux came out again to check on me. Whew!

Doorway

2008-03-05T02:54:00.002+08:00

Just a quick thought.

I was sitting in the corridor of the lodge- the room felt a little claustrophobic. From studying the paint, you could tell that the walls were painted rather poorly and probably with a lousy brush. The job was not smooth and ridges had appeared.

Leaning over, I felt the texure of the wall. As you can tell, the corridor ain't that big. It was an odd thing to do, I know. Then again, neither is sitting on the floor of the narrow corridor outside your room considered the most everyday thing. I just felt like doing it. After all, does there always have to be a reason for everything?

Back to the wall, it reminded me faintly of wood. The way a person feels along the grain of it. The wall didn't feel bad- just different. I guess what my point is; imperfection is good.

In transit

2008-03-03T04:08:00.002+08:00

Flying over India now.

The view outside is gorgeous; -stars of all shapes and sizes litter the skies. Alright, I'm lying. The stars are not really dfferently shaped but it just sounds better. The view though is absolutely mind-blowing, mouth-gaping, awe-inspiringly breathtaking. Whew! That was a lot of hyphens! Incredible India alright.

We are so high up that the clouds are below us. All you can see are specks of light below, like a large gathering of fireflies. It really knocks some sense into you about how much of a small fry you are.

The spectacle continues on in the Middle East when it suddenly goes dark past the Caspian sea. It's only till we are about half an hour away to Manchester that the view perks up again. Though it remains dark, you can see the rising of the new day across the horizon with its shades of orange and teal. The sliver of a crescent lingers on in the sky, holding on till it's hung.

A slight layer of snow makes up the welcoming party in Lake District. Snow-capped mountains with white hills make stunning sight. I highly doubt it would remain a fixture though.

Triumph

2008-02-02T01:06:00.000+08:00

Triumph.
Not the bra.

It was such a theme for Ayn Rand's The Fountainhead and Atlas Shrugged. Well, perhaps not outright.

I guess it is quite an achievement to survive Year 2. Totally killer year.

Two years in. Check!
Two CCAs. Check!
Two of me?

Shall take note of the last one.

Random stuff

2008-01-21T15:04:00.000+08:00

Happy birthday Rach!

I think you'll love what I got you -no pictures of me though.
I'm growing my hair, especially my fringe, out.

I'll just random my way through the rest of this post.

I wish The Picturehouse would bring in "Odette Toulemonde," among other films by Catherine Deneuve and Nathalie Baye!

Some Isabelle Huppert would be nice too!
ps. "Comedy of Power" was not her best collaboration with Chabrol.

Jeremy Irons is gorgeous.

I can't wait to see "Sweeney Todd."
Johnny Depp is...*sighs*

Can't focus enough to study.

Giselle in the park should be interesting.

King Lear: The Avoidance of Love was awesome, hilarious, thought-provoking...and was in March 2007, come to think of it.

Reba duets- I hope this doesn't mean I'm going country.

I need to see "I'm Not There."

The Beatles are amazing -but I always knew that since 9. =p

Over Me

2008-01-07T22:38:00.000+08:00

I love this line in "Love Actually" where Liam Neeson talks about his late wife at her funeral. She had tried to prepare him for her death and was talking to him about what she specifically wanted him to do. To which he said, "over my dead body," and she replied, "no, over mine."

I should not be here. I should be doing my work- the work I know I so desperately need to finish. The work I know, I feel I cannot complete. I just have no clue what to do. I do the work which is not urgent, which can be delegated but I can't do the pressing stuff.

Maybe it is exhaustion or just being burnt out. I feel like Esther Greenwood, where I no longer can function and I'm losing my bearing. It is no longer a wish or a need to disappear but a burning desire that is in every fibre of my being. I just want to weep from the sheer scariness of the situation.

I screwed up my presentation on Friday- somehow words just failed me and even I realised that it was gibberish I was speaking. I screwed up my interview today- I know I did not expect it, and I was too abstract. I don't really know if I want to be President. It is a frightening thing. What I do know is that I love tc despite the work, and I do want to lead it. I just can't articulate much. When I can make sense, I get thrown off easily and I cannot think quickly on my feet anymore.

Perhaps my mind is just shutting down. I can only write what I feel and nothing else.
No more work, no more bullshit.

The Fountainhead

2007-12-07T10:53:00.000+08:00

Ayn Rand.

Brilliant book.

The minute I picked it up, it engulfed me body, mind and soul. It was as if the book had possessed me- some madness, some thing just drove me to keep on reading and it felt like I lived every moment in it.

Very few books do that to me. Intrigue me, move me, drive me to despair. Quite a few have done so but it is very rare to find a book that weaves such a fatalistic spell on me throughout.

I have books which reflect my inner being so perfectly -the bell jar, books which lure me in as they spin a web of intrigue around me and books that drive me to despair in a showing of pathos -asylum. I read them time and again like old weathered friends. They are ol' companions in my journey of life.

Just like when I read the prequel in The Tales of the Otori- "Heaven's Net is Wide," it was as if a supernatural spell was on me and I read the book as if it was on fire. It shocked Githa when I finished that thick book in 5 hours.

showtime soon

2007-11-15T23:38:00.000+08:00

November's here.

A Merry Little Christmas is coming your way soon. Watch out world!

Plenty of work to be done and it is calling out to me. I'm getting a little nervous and overwhelmed. When a production comes along, it just consumes my every waking moment. It is in my head almost all the time till it exhausts me.

It was just like that during 10/10. I could not sleep- instead i would be lying in bed going over the play in my head. I would dissect it and examine the finer points.

It drives me insane.

birthday

2007-10-30T21:30:00.000+08:00

18.

Big number. Big Day.

CA.

Dead...tired.

Extremely goofy friends.

Fell asleep -ended early. Not a reflection on the company.

-That's the story of my 18th birthday.-

It's about time

2007-08-31T23:59:00.000+08:00

It's the end of the month, the eve of a new day. I quite like this moment when an end and a beginning mingle. You don't know just when exactly the transition is made till after it is done ad the debris has settled. The end of August marks the end of my papers and perhaps the start for many of my friends. It is the month of scholars in some sense, with plenty starting university and the rest revising intensively.

I went back to TK yesterday instead of today so as to avoid the chaos and crowd. A countdown should probably be started to anticipate the moment I no longer want to go back. It seems to me that there are alot of new teachers in TK now. At least, I got to see some of my 'old' teachers and talk with them. Mdm Hassan, as usual, is very much the same -awesome. I figured she probably prefer edibles. =j

Ms Ho looked a little thin but cheerful as always. She thinks my favourite word is 'awesome' but I don't quite agree. It's quite cute though. Ms J's hair looks real pretty now. Previously, it used to be tight curls but now it is much looser and natural. It looks really good but it would be way awkward if I told her that now wouldn't it? Can you imagine her reaction? *collapses in giggles*

laughing & crying at the same time

2007-07-24T23:09:00.001+08:00

What do i do?

I want to laugh and cry all at the same time. My mind is going to distraction. I've so much going on in my head, emotions driving me to despair. Desperation is starting to course through my veins but I can't let it out in the open. It is just not in me to let slip what I'm feeling but if you know me well enough, you could probably tell. Rai did -over sms; I wonder how she knew. One dead giveaway, I'm told, are my eyes.

All this pent-up emotions have to be let out sometime or I'll go off my rocker like Lear. RSC did a splendid all-round production, by the way. I especially enjoyed the performances from William Gaunt and Frances Barber.

Is it too late to crawl into a hole and disappear?

Poetry

2007-07-13T23:01:00.000+08:00

Just thought I share some of my favourite poems.

Sir Philip Sidney
My True-Love Hath My Heart

My true-love hath my heart, and I have his,
By just exchange one for the other given.
I hold his dear, and mine he cannot miss:
There never was a bargain better driven.
His heart in me keeps me and him in one;
My heart in him his thoughts and senses guides:
He loves my heart, for once it was his own;
I cherish his because in me it bides.
His heart his wound received from my sight;
My heart was wounded with his wounded heart;
For as from me on him his hurt did light,
So still, methought, in me his hurt did smart:
Both equal hurt, in this change sought our bliss,
My true love hath my heart and I have his.

Lord Byron
When We Two Parted

When we two parted
In silence and tears,
Half broken-hearted
To sever for years,
Pale grew thy cheek and cold,
Colder thy kiss;
Truly that hour foretold
Sorrow to this.

The dew of the morning
Sunk chill on my brow--
It felt like the warning
Of what I feel now.
Thy vows are all broken,
And light is thy fame;
I hear thy name spoken,
And share in its shame.

They name thee before me,
A knell to mine ear;
A shrudder comes o'er me--
Why wert thou so dear?
They know not I knew thee,
Who knew thee so well--
Long, long I shall rue thee,
Too deeply to tell.

In secret we met--
In silence I grieve,
That thy heart could forget,
Thy spirit deceive
If I should meet thee
After long years,
How should I greet thee?--
With silence and tears.

William Wordsworth
Daffodils

I wandered lonely as a cloud
That floats on high o'er vales and hills,
When all at once I saw a crowd,
A host, of golden daffodils;
Beside the lake, beneath the trees,
Fluttering and dancing in the breeze.

Continuous as the stars that shine
And twinkle on the milky way,
They stretched in never-ending line
Along the margin of a bay:
Ten thousand saw I at a glance,
Tossing their heads in sprightly dance.

The waves beside them danced;
but they Out-did the sparkling waves in glee:
A poet could not but be gay,
In such a jocund company:
I gazed - and gazed - but little thought
What wealth the show to me had brought:

For oft, when on my couch I lie
In vacant or in pensive mood,
They flash upon that inward eye
Which is the bliss of solitude;
And then my heart with pleasure fills,
And dances with the daffodils.

Elizabeth Barrett Browning
A Man's Requirements

I
Love me Sweet, with all thou art,
Feeling, thinking, seeing;
Love me in the lightest part,
Love me in full being.

II
Love me with thine open youth
In its frank surrender;
With the vowing of thy mouth,
With its silence tender.

III
Love me with thine azure eyes,
Made for earnest grantings;
Taking colour from the skies,
Can Heaven's truth be wanting?

IV
Love me with their lids, that fall
Snow-like at first meeting;
Love me with thine heart, that all
Neighbours then see beating.

V
Love me with thine hand stretched out
Freely -- open-minded:
Love me with thy loitering foot, --
Hearing one behind it.

VI
Love me with thy voice, that turns
Sudden faint above me;
Love me with thy blush that burns
When I murmur 'Love me!'

VII
Love me with thy thinking soul,
Break it to love-sighing;
Love me with thy thoughts that roll
On through living -- dying.

VIII
Love me in thy gorgeous airs,
When the world has crowned thee;
Love me, kneeling at thy prayers,
With the angels round thee.

IX
Love me pure, as muses do,
Up the woodlands shady:
Love me gaily, fast and true,
As a winsome lady.

X
Through all hopes that keep us brave,
Farther off or nigher,
Love me for the house and grave,
And for something higher.

XI
Thus, if thou wilt prove me, Dear,
Woman's love no fable,
I will love thee -- half a year --
As a man is able.

Confused

2007-07-12T21:19:00.000+08:00

I wonder what I'm doing.

Today was pretty nice and laidback. I stayed home and slept. Not only that, I got the awesome DVDs I ordered from Amazon. You're now "looking" at the proud owner of "Callas Forever" and "Indochine." After staying up working on a chunk of stuff for weeks, it is so nice to have a break. Plus I think the lack of rest is making me cranky and faint. The amount of times I've been walking back and forth from one end of the school to the other, on top of running up flights of stairs is so invigorating. Yeah right.

"Hot Fuzz" was bloody brilliant- I laughed so hard with Rai and Ai. I had an awesome time with them. Ai and I went for tea first then to Plaza Sing to catch the flick with Rai. That was some time ago, when I went for 'Dollhouse.'

Army Daze is coming soon...next week! I'm starting to panic, about ticket sales and the stuff to be done. It was kind of on the backburner in my mind with all the projects I have on and all. So...

COME FOR ARMY DAZE, PEOPLE!!!

I'll consider it a favour. Message me for tickets. They cost 10 bucks a piece but it's SO worth it.

I'm rather 'scatterbrained' at the moment. It feels like I'm getting pulled in all directions. I don't feel like I can do anything right at the moment. Its too confusing.

just great

2007-06-09T21:22:00.000+08:00

I just don't care any more. There are more important things in life. Why do I even give a damn about things? Maybe it was all just a mistake caring when it pulls me apart.

I want to be far away. To live in London, Paris, NY, Venice or New Orleans. How cliche. Living there wouldn't make me happy. There are always unhappy people everywhere. Killing themselves slowly each day with every reluctant motion. Dead inside like the paper pushers they used to laugh at.

How droll life can get.

love me if you dare

2007-06-09T20:45:00.000+08:00

Maybe I love you, maybe I don't. I don't know my own mind. I want some pixie dust and magic. Throw in some laughter and a dash of tears. Perhaps fairy tales are just not meant to come true. That's why there never is anything after happily ever after. No talk of madness, anger or misery.

The nearest thing to heaven, its the nearest thing we have to heaven. I don't want to study, I want to learn. They are two different things. I want the wind in my hair and the crisp smell of leaves. To feel the energy around me and the rush of a thrill. I like the laid-back life, hearing a song I used to sing along with. Not to be a faux intellectual in a backstabbing world. I don't want it. I don't want you or what you have to offer. So what in hell am I doing here? I wonder.

Its like the sun going down on me. I'm a wreck.

So over you

2007-06-07T23:48:00.000+08:00

I'm so over him. Finally. Thanks Rai for getting me through it and for the hug. *hug*

We went to watch "Zodiac" today. It was interesting and I like the shots the director used. I found it quite cool that it focused on the obsession that gripped the people investigating the murders. There was this intensity and terseness about it. Some parts I just couldn't bear to watch, so I had to look through my fingers. Yes, I'm "sensitive." There was this scary part where we ended up clutching each other. At certain moments during the movie, the guys behind us would laugh over stupid things like swearing. *rolls eyes*

We couldn't stop giggling during this one point of the movie when Rai noticed a foot sticking out from the seat next to her. This guy from the row above stuck his foot out. But mostly Rai was suffering from boredom. She just fidgeted throughout the second half. I think it might have been too long for her, 2 hours 40 min. Well, at least she liked the movie. I completely forgot that I subjected her to "The Aviator." That really killed her! And probably numbed her butt. HAHA

ps Robert Downey Jr. was HOT in it. He had this rugged intensity about him that was SO Johnny Depp. Plus he was playing a reporter. ;p

rest is rare

2007-05-26T01:45:00.000+08:00

I'm tired, quite tired.

I got rather down when the little bird flew away some time back. Guess I'm experiencing empty nest syndrome ahead of my time huh? HAHA

Then, one day, it came back. At least, I think its the same little bird who lost its sibling. My mum seems to have the idea that it came back to lay its own eggs in the little hanging alcove. I quite like the idea of that. It certainly cheered me up a bit. =)

I feel quite overworked right now. My bones linger on, trailing miles away after my mind. I miss doing dance a little. The training has come in rather handy, with the untapped reserves of energy you find to keep on going. Perhaps I could entice Raf to join a Pilates class with me, that is if we can both find the time or energy to do it.

Note to self: tea is a comfort and stay away from SDT's Pilates class to avoid meeting "people."

You belong to me

2007-04-27T20:29:00.000+08:00

See the pyramids along the Nile
Watch the sunrise on a tropic isle
Just remember darlin' all the while
You belong to me

See the market place in Old Algiers
Send me photographs and souvenirs
Just remember when a dream appears
You belong to me

I'll be so alone without you
Maybe you'll be lonesome too, and blue
Fly the ocean in a silver plane
See the jungle when it's wet with rain
Just remember 'til you're home again
You belong to me

Fly the ocean in a silver plane
See the jungle when it's wet with rain
Just remember 'til you're home again
You belong to me

Its tragic that the little bird by my door will never ever get to do those things. I know there isn't much of a link between the song and the bird, but it fits in my heart. The little bird didn't even stand a chance when some idiot took it out of its nest. My heart aches when I recall how a couple of boys were laughing and wondering why there was a beak. It was still so young. To have died while a storm rages on, to have robbed a sibling or a parent of a beloved, at such a tender age. After scooping up the frail body from the floor and washing the blood away, I buried it near its nest and shed a tear. I pray that the little wooden cross will be the only one there.

Corruption rules?

2007-04-02T16:54:00.000+08:00

Awesome!

According to my junior (Gek), I corrupted the library. I miss you too, by the way. MWAHAHAHA...

Apparently, I taught them -

to eat in the librarian's workroom in plain sight, for the entire library to behold
to blast music in the workroom
to run in the rain and then come in to the library dripping wet
to be all sarcastic
how to gulp down a 1.5l Pokka Green Tea under 5 mins
and oh yeah, shelf and wrap books

In my defense, I would like to say it was absolutely necessary! ;p

hang on

2007-03-30T16:40:00.000+08:00

Rach,

Guess what?

We might see each other in June. Since I can't send you cash for airfare nor are you earning enough to buy a ticket, how about the next best thing?

My parents want to catch up with some friends of theirs in Canada but it depends on my schedule. IMH might let me out after all! Apparently, my meds are working or so they think. Then I'll get to see you and meet Chris. ;p Plus stock up on that long list of dvd s I've been dying to get my hands on.

p.s. I know you're working in a flower shop but please don't sneak all the dark red roses home!

Death on the Nile

2007-03-08T01:33:00.000+08:00

Having just watched "The Fountain" two days ago, the idea of death still weighs heavily on my mind. Does not knowing when we will die really get us through living? The main theme seemed to be about acceptance of death. If we can find a way to cure a disease, do we push on or just accept the inevitable?

"Death is the road to awe." Its a line from the film. There is a really interesting story that goes along with it. In regards to what a Mayan guide told her about his father's death, Rachel Weisz's character says,

"They planted a seed over his grave. The seed became a tree. Moses said his father became a part of that tree. He grew into the wood, into the bloom. And when a sparrow ate the tree's fruit, his father flew with the birds. He said... death was his father's road to awe. That's what he called it. The road to awe."

I love the sentiment behind it. Should we really fear death? Or are we just fearing the unknown? Having said that, I don't quite see how Brad Pitt or Cate Blanchett (no matter how great I think she is) could have played Hugh Jackman or Rachel Weisz's roles. Though I kept thinking that Kate Winslet or Jennifer Connelly could have filled Rachel Weisz's shoes rather nicely.

It IS so much harder to be with someone as they die than say opposed to a birth. I've never experienced the death of a loved one firsthand, at least not someone I'm close to. Honestly, I don't think we'll ever get over it but we learn to live with it over time. The pain dulls but the ache is still there. It is so easy to say to someone that we understand their pain in their time of need but do we? Saying that you're sorry does not help the mourners. Just how on earth do you truly comfort someone without lying to them, that everything will be alright?

100

2007-03-08T01:13:00.000+08:00

Does anyone want to lend me their kickass property by the sea? I promise I'll take good care of it, well at least I'll try. It's for a good cause, the help-jer-retain-what's-left of her sanity cause. Cool right?

Since this is my 100th entry, I shall write whatever pops into my head. Like how much I want people to give me HMV vouchers for my birthday (instead of stuff that is NOT my taste) so I can blow it on DVDs or hoping that my room will be clean without me lifting a finger. I really want to move back into my room and keep my stuff nicely. Whether it stays that way is a different matter. Plus I dont want my bedroom to stay pink. Pink hasn't been my favourite colour since, well, the middle of my primary school days.

I don't know if I love Venice more or Paris. Having just seen "Paris Je'taime" (which was quite lovely by the way), it occurs to me or well, Raf, that I've been haunting the cinemas more or less every week these past few weeks. What can I say? There are too many films I want to see. Browsing in HMV both thrills and depresses me. I have not enough money or time to even go through what is available.

After a month of going cold turkey, I finally bought my ipod the other week (the way other week, 16th Feb). I didn't realise how much I missed listening to music SO MUCH! Its way black and way sexy. ;p

The DaNewswriting Code

2007-02-02T16:58:00.000+08:00

Random ideas.

Book

The DaNewswriting Code
Someone reminded me to post this.

There is a secret sect devoted to, what else, News Writing. However, this sect is not so secret anymore. They are called The Triple Ng s (in ode to the triple entente) -made up of Ms Claire Ng, Ms Helen Ng and Mr Victor Ng. Together, they plan to rule the world by controlling the news. How are they going to pull it off you may ask. The answer lies in controlling the minds of dmc students and brainwashing them to feed the public their propaganda. The problem was they were not alone in co-ordinating the news writing module. There was an impure Ng, Suzanne Jung. So, they had to get rid of her. The two Ms Ng s attacked her in the ladies at the Channel News Asia studio with curling irons!!! AHHH! The horror! As you may know, both Ms Ng s had permed, curled hair when this was written but Ms Helen Ng has since cut her hair. Thus, we now have one Ms Ng with curled shoulder-length hair and another with about shoulder-length straight hair. With Suzanne Jung out of the way, they could bring in the last piece of the puzzle, Victor Ng. Part of their strategy worked, thanks to the help of another impure Ng who belonged to one-half of Kwanga. Will they succeed? Read the book to find out.

This MAY be a true story.

Currently, we're in talks with blockbolster studios. We're THIS close to getting the film made, thanks to the very tall, youthful, gorgeous and married Mrs Keanu Reeves-Kwa. That was certainly a mouthful! Plus, Shermaine has signed on to play the role of Suzanne Jung.

Film

Looking For Christie

A young man whom we never see is a huge fan of the artist, Christie. Nothing is known about this artist but we learn more each day through Christie's work. This young man is our eyes and he collects whatever he can find that alludes to Christie. It is an obsession that drives him to near breaking point. He goes through life just looking for Christie, till the point that it consumes him and he can search no further. Christie no longer creates. It drives the young man to the point of heartbreak and he dies. We next visit his grave. He is Christie.

Just musing.

Happy Birthday Rach

2007-01-21T17:26:00.000+08:00

Rach,

You've finally turned 18. *hug* When are you going to buy me that beer? Not that it matters, I don't like to drink. =j

We've known each other since we were 9 and we've been best friends since. I knew all your favourite stuff and you knew mine. We fought, we cried and we even kinda liked the same guy. Years have gone and the laughter is still there. We went our seperate ways and made different friends. Our tastes changed and we weren't the same people. I know we may never ever be that close again but you still cheer me up with your care. Even after these years, you comfort me like no one can.

I just wanted to say Happy Birthday to my best friend.

p.s. Christopher seems nice and you guys make a cute couple. =j

Orientation dust

2007-01-05T20:31:00.000+08:00

Goodness, I feel old! It seems an eternity since we were all in Sec 1. Bet we never would have guessed we be where we are today. =j

Well, I went back to help out with the library orientation for the second time in a row. I got this call from Mdm Hassan on Wednesday night, asking if I was free. Truth be told, I was supposed to be studying and stuff like that. My mum would have had a fit if I told her I was going down again. She was all, you're no longer in tk anymore, when I came home on Thursday. I guess I did it out of a sense of duty and for old times sake. It was pretty fun going back, though not everything is the same of course. Looking at the Sec 1s brought back tons of memories; some good, some bad. Were we ever like them? When we first came to tk, were we ever that timid and shy? Perhaps. Though I do remember Mdm Hassan telling us off for making too much noise while waiting for our turn for library orientation. Haha.

After orientation and a quick lunch, I headed down to school for the open house. It was a open house cum Manda's birthday cum catch up session. Long huh? Thankfully, my dad drove me down. If not, I would have never lived down carrying a huge stuffed (toy) panda around. Manda-Panda, get it? Lame i know. Rai, Ai, Manda and I met up in foodcourt 5 before checking out the open house. Rai wanted to see what courses were offered before she (possibly) switches over. The convention centre looked pretty packed. Thankfully, all of our courses were housed on the first floor. Ai and Rai went all nuts over the guides for the different school, while Manda and I rolled our eyes. Sheesh! ;p

We met tons of people there. Covering the entire floor rather quickly, we came to Ai's course where we met her lecturer, Zainon. Ai introduced us as her ex-classmates which prompted a question regarding where we had studied together.

Oh my, the way Zainon said TKGS as if it was a vile word was not lost on the lecturer next to her. The lecturer then asked if it was a good school. She said, "Supposedly good." Ai and I agreed that the standard has dropped quite a bit since its heyday. Somewhere along the lines, the phrase "supposedly well-behaved" was used to describe tk girls. I know the word, supposedly, is quite subjective but I do take offense at it. Overall, tk girls are a good bunch except for the occasional high spirits. I don't see anything wrong with that. Well, i just responded by raising my eyebrow and clarified what she meant by "supposedly well-behaved." I didn't get a satisfactory response.

Conversation then flowed to how TK promotes only JC life to their students. True, it does not provide a balanced outlook. I quite agree but I do find it a bit off tangent for Zainon to go on waxing lyrical about the advantages and quality of poly life. So, I mentioned that despite the lack of promotion in TK, we had been taught to think for ourselves. As such, we would be able to decide for ourselves where we wanted to go -thank you very much. Citing ourselves as examples, I went on about how we had gone that path and did our own research in response to our interest in our respective fields. Ai explained that all of us, with the exception of Rai, were already attending SP. She then mentioned that she had seriously considered going out for Manda's course. Woa! The way Zainon jumped on that was an Olympic-worthy feat. She snidely implied that Ai had settled for her current course. That just made my blood boil. I could already sense that Rai was pissed off too, way before that thinnly-veiled snipe. I told her straight that Ai was serious about her work and had been VERY interested in the course a good six months before she applied for it. With that having been said, I excused Rai and myself before walking off. I knew I would have said more if I didn't and a personal attack would be just stooping to her level. Nobody gets away with pulling that kind of tripe crap with my friends when I'm around. Sorry Ai, but I just couldn't stand there while that smug cat calmly licks the cream off her whiskers. I'm really sorry.

Rai definitely lightened my mood when she went all bitchy as we walked off. "I just want to slap her face around. What's her problem?" Rai, in her usual manner, started to imitate Zainon. Haha. When Manda and Ai joined us later, we had a much more pleasant encounter with another lecturer -Ms Kwa. Rai pronounced her a true tkgian -meaning fun, crappy, sassy, sense of humour and all that jazz. =)

I hope Rai decideds on a course that is the best fit for her, though I would definitely prefer if she goes here! Next up: breakfast with Ros and Si Min, followed by checking out the cca promotion day at tk, then lunch with Mdm Hassan tomorrow.

Personality

2006-12-18T14:34:00.000+08:00

Benevolent Creator

May be true, may not be....you decide ;p

scroll over the various coloured rectangles to see what it signifies.

Who said?

2006-12-08T21:33:00.000+08:00

What the crap! That reminds me of vertebra when said fast, well its quite random actually....HAHAHAHA (4e9 joke) ;p

I'm desperate to watch Belle Maman except there is no copy available here nor does it come with english subtitles. Never mind though, I can have a Catherine Deneuve film fest of my own during the holidays -The Umbrellas of Cherbourg, Mississppi Mermaid, 8 Femmes and I can just borrow the rest! =) Not forgetting the long-delayed LOTR extended movie triathlon Rai, Renu and I were supposed to have ages ago.

On to lighter stuff, I finally got my hands on a copy of Jane Birkin's latest CD! Titled "Fictions", it totally rocks. Social life absolutely looking up should I get through the last week of school unscathed. Let's see -shopping (just stopping by espirit and papier) and a bbq on saturday, dragging Raf to The Picturehouse on wednesday to see Turning Pages after my GEMS presentation, La Sylphide on friday and dinner with Rai and Yu Lin at Fish 'n' Co on monday! Then on to Melaka for a break where I will finally get my kebaya made.

1 more week! =)

Random musings

2006-11-26T16:36:00.000+08:00

All the things she said...all the things she said...running through my head...running through my head...running through my head. Nad, that goes out to you! haha

I remember you used to sing the song loads and it drove me quite insane. hehe.

Back to the song, I feel like I'm on the run from myself in my own head. Confusing? Think about how I feel then! ;p

Someone really close to me noticed how I haven't been myself lately. She said that i have been more miserable and tired nowadays. I totally agree. My social life right now is practically NON-existent!!! Crikes.

I want to go watch movies and have time to chill out on the bed to watch the dvd s I bought ages ago. I want to have my LOTR extended triathalon! I need to hang out at the beach to straighten myself out and read a book by the breezy sea. Chill out with a cold drink and crap my achy breaky heart out with my friends. Thats what I need.

15 things you like about me

2006-11-13T00:00:00.000+08:00

1. Think of 10 statements about yourself that are true
2. Throw in 5 believable statements that are false
3. Mix them together and hey presto!
4. Post the list and get others to guess the red herrings (the fake statements)
5. Make 5 people hate you by choosing them to do this lil' exercise =j

-lets get it on-

1. My favourite colour is purple but I wear black/white alot.
2. I fall asleep at music recitals like my school band's concert.
3. My favourite flowers are white tulips.
4. The smell of mushrooms sometimes makes me sick.
5. I went to the beach and cried when I found out my best friend was leaving for Canada.
6. I think that R.I stands for really intellectual.
7. The first ballet I attended was Cinderella.
8. Cinderella was my first video tape.
9. When I get stressed, I start screaming at people for no reason.
10. I swore never to set foot in the US as long as George Bush Jr. was President.
11. My sense of humor is very dry/ sarcastic.
12. I only buy flowers when I have a reason.
13. For prom, I wore a sarong.
14. I dislike physical Geography but am pretty good in directions.
15. Swimming is one of the things I like to do.

-lets point fingers-

1. Rach
2. Raf
3. Ai
4. Crys
5. Anyone who doesn't read this. You can do it too! haha

I miss you

2006-11-06T00:08:00.000+08:00

I miss running in the rain, when the rain drops pound the ground senseless all around you. I miss the smell after the rain stops. I miss the feeling you get when you come into the room dripping wet. I miss the coolness in the non air-conditioned bus when it drizzles. I miss the double takes uptight people give you when you're drenched.

I miss the sunset in the evenings. I miss the cool breeze by the sea. I miss lying on the bench at the beach, just to think. I miss laughing with friends till we're all in stitches. I miss feeling as if we were the only people in the world who knew how to have fun. I miss giving people a piece of my mind. I miss feeling alive.

I miss the colour in this bleak world. I miss the constant challenges life brought. I miss feeling relaxed. I miss my friends' constant ribbing about being a you-know-what. I miss talking utter crap (especially with Rai) till it makes no sense at all. I miss rocking out with Rai as if no one could see us. I miss Ai's little idiosyncrasies.

I miss my juniors being spastic. I miss Ms Ho's trolley bag. I miss Mdm Hassan's drama. I miss Ms J's smile. I miss eating and drinking in the tk library. I miss watching Si Min freak out at the juniors. I miss Dia's curly "trees". I miss having our meetings in the morning at the bus stop. I miss watching the benchmark go by every morning. I miss Si Min ambushing us as we get to the carpark. I miss the blank look you guys give me when I ramble on. I miss our ben-n-jerry pig out sessions in the workroom.

I miss good fish-n-chips. I miss the Royal Ballet. I miss a sense of humor. I miss wit. I miss pleasure and sweet satisfaction. I miss analysing everything under the sun with Raf. I miss noticing beautiful scenery for the first time. I miss being lulled to sleep on the bus. I miss taking trains. I miss being carefree.

I miss you.

Love Actually

2006-10-29T21:16:00.000+08:00

I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *hugz*

Bet you didn't expect me to start with that right? =) It just really hit me that I do have people out there who care for me.

On my birthday, I met up with Ai and Rai for dinner. Rai was so major sweet! She got me a JOHNNY DEPP poster from POTC2! AHHHHHHHH!!!! Rai and I ate till we were stuffed. First, we had onion rings and cheesesticks from Burger King, then we both had fish 'n' chips from Fish N Co'. Add on some garlic bread, drinks, soup and then pile on the ice cream sundae from Swensens. =) The waiter at Swensens was rather random- he told me that he liked my shawl after he took our orders. haha

When we were walking around, we saw Lania with her sisters! It was pretty surreal...

Anyway, on Friday, I went out with Si Min and Jin. Before that, I went to Dia's house for lunch where I met Yi Jin. Without telling me, the three of them had bought me a birthday present- Love Actually DVD! I never expected anyone to actually get me something from my wishlist.haha...

Goodness, I sound so materialistic...=j

Mail

2006-10-18T22:16:00.000+08:00

I love getting mail! I don't know why.

I guess that writing letters is not very common nowadays thanks to the wonder that is the internet. That is three "I"s in a row, getting kinda self-absorbed aren't we? *raises eyebrow in mirror*

Lately, I have been checking my mailbox (the physical one) everyday in anticipation of a letter from Rach. Miss her. =j Plus, I know she got me something for my birthday, which is in a week's time!

Have I moaned about my terrible day mapped out by the school for my birthday yet? I will be having an extra, I repeat an extra, not make-up *we had the make-up already. Some definitely more made up than others eh?* ECONS lecture at 8 AM! Don't you just love punctuation marks? Must be contagious -Miss Ho. After 4 hours of glorious, mind-blowing econs, I have a break of an hour and a half before Scents, Cents and Sense. Once I meet the requirements of boring myself to sleep from an hour of perfumes, class starts 20 minutes late by the way, I get to go for a visit to an advertising agency which was sprung on us last week. Well, truthfully, it was not a surprise, just the date was. All this when I would rather be out enjoying my coming 17 years of age, I dare not say wisdom. Haha...

I just wish I could take Ai's "suggestion" and skip school but missing econs will kill me indirectly. Not only does my precarious understanding of the subject slip further down, my parents would murder me! At least I'm looking forward to dinner. =) I'm meeting Ai and Rai at the airport to celebrate. =j Then on Friday, I will be having dinner with Si Min and Mdm Shaba.

Now I just need to use positive thinking and imagine I can use my obviously superior jedi powers to get my homework done. Perhaps, I could pretend I have the One Ring and I rule over all of Middle Earth. Then I will get the elves to do my bidding. The hobbits could clean up my room for me. Hehe...

Dropped by the main library today to meet Ai (to get my book, Harsh Cry of The Heron, back. Its so sad...) and for chocolate, dark chocolate! =) Ai Ling said to drop by no earlier than 12.30 p.m and no later than 1 p.m for dark chocolate, after Andy and I pestered her yesterday. She called us her children, so we decided to nick name her Niang or Mummy. Haha...

Basically we played afool while Andy did the Eliser Quiz. What do you like about Eliser? Answer: It smells like Pepperoni pizza! What improvements would you like done to Eliser? Answer: Make it more inaccessible and smell like Super Supreme pizza! =)

We might have driven Ai Ling nuts with the crap we talked about. Under Highlights, we wrote -for hair? =D That reminds me that Ai Ling mentioned she once had midnight blue hair about 5 years ago. Hmm...

What do you think if I dyed my hair, highlight it or shaved my head bald? ;p

Attachment

2006-10-15T02:18:00.001+08:00

Yesterday, my dad asked me the strangest question out of the blue. He asked if anyone has ever asked me out. It brought to mind another intrusive question a couple of weeks back my mum asked, "Are you seeing someone?" I mean, what is up with that! I never could have seen that question coming. Just where the heck did it come from?

Its not like I'm desperate for a relationship. I don't really see the point of grabbing the next guy I see on the street just for the sake of hooking up. Plus have you seen some of the guys on the street? *shudder*

I remember talking *read sms-ing* to ms ho about polys before "O" level results were out. She mis-read my sms I think, and sent me a reply about guys instead. She recommends church guys who apparently are supposed to be gentlemen. I'm not too sure if she has been to my church! haha

I don't think I would fall for someone that easily but when I do, it would be hard. The cashier at the petrol station outside tk, Wati asked me sometime back if I had a boyfriend. When I told her no, she went, "why?" She was really sweet, I guess that little incident with the delivery guy sparked her sudden interest in my non-existent love life.

All these incidents are topped by my family. My love life sometimes comes up among my relatives at family dinners of all places! Wonder why I don't like family dinners that much still? Well, those aren't really the reasons and they can be quite pleasant at times. My grandfther brought up marriage today. He's setting a deadline for me. I know I want to do journalism and deadlines are part of that lifestyle but this is ridiculous don't you think? He wants me to be married before he dies, latest by age 25. Wow! *raised eyebrow* My grandmother's cousin always asks when I'm getting married more or less everytime she sees me. I'm not even 17 for goodness sake! It probably is illegal for me to get hitched in some countries. Why target me? Don't even bring up my name. *death glare*

This is all very random, just some jotters. ;p

Carmen

2006-10-14T23:05:00.000+08:00

The first Da:ns Festival is on at the esplanade. As you can guess, I just had to get tickets of course! Caught two performances; Red Giselle and Carmen. Both were fantastic, with their own merits. Russian versus Spanish, Ballet + Modern versus Flamenco, expression versus passion...

Red Giselle was pretty mind-blowing. It wasn't just plain ballet. Technique-wise, the dancers were fantastic. The Ballerina was amazingly supple and flexible. She was so tall and thin, reminding me of an Olympic gymnast. The main dancers were so expressive in their moves and facial expressions.

The set was rather rough, the feel quite Russian. I don't know the exact words to describe it. It was beautiful and functional in its own right but not stunning. A diamond in the rough, a sparse diamond you could say. The whole thing was dark and hanting, it just grabs hold of your mind and stays in it. However, it did have me checking my watch a few times. It wasn't entirely captivating. The ovation was very long and quite loud. My hands were hurting after clapping for such an extensive period of time.

Carmen on the other hand was gorgeous. The clothes and colour scheme was stunning. Progressing from a beige, nude set to a colourful palette then to the ever popular black and reddish-orange hues, it served the opera very well. I'm pretty sure that I have seen the company perform before, I think it was last year. I thoroughly enjoyed the whole performance, the music and simple sets were perfect. The dancing was showcased quite nicely. The dancers were great. However, it just didn't drag me in or make me feel anything much. It had its moments but still something was missing. I love their passion and spontaneity, which came through in their dancing. After all, flamenco is without a doubt more robust and full of life than traditional ballet which is beautiful but a tad frigid sometimes. That is probably where the modern dance aspect in Red Giselle comes in but its is Giselle after all.

In contrast to the Russian's dark, wraith-like feel, Carmen was bold and passionate. The vibe was warm, especially among the company. During their deafening ovation that was not as long as the one for Red Giselle, they gorgeously did various short sets. It just felt so natural, they had to keep coming forward to bow. I would love to see both companies perform again.

However, nothing can compare to the deafening ovation the Royal Ballet got last year. It was magical.

Life is a Rollercoaster..Gotta learn how to Ride it

2006-09-30T22:54:00.001+08:00

You know the song sung by Ronan Keating, "Life is a rollercoaster", it actually is quite true. You have to learn how to ride out life's little idiosyncrasies, which you figure out as you age.

I have been pretty moody this past few weeks, fine- i was moody. I'm guessing its a cocktail of hormones, stress and my grandparents' constant bickering. For goodness sake, i woke up to them scolding each other over one of them being unable to open a bottle of Listerine!

So it is with great pleasure that I announce their newfound status - tenants of a charming apartment, elsewhere of my home. Not that I do not love them or anything but I doubt that there will be a day when they spend pleasant time together with nary a harsh word.

First week of school and the heat is on, well not on full blast yet...obviously. I have got to get my act together. Yesterday was a beautiful day spent best with friends like Ai and Rai. I'm glad we managed to meet up, though next time somewhere a little closer to home may be appreciated, Ai.

Happy Children's Day! in advance

We are all kids forced to pretend that we have grown up. Join the delusion.

PMS-ing

2006-09-22T20:26:00.000+08:00

There has got to be another word besides depressed. I've been having terrible mood swings- I'm happy one minute and gloomy the next.

My grandparents just moved in with us. It can get a little hot around the collar at times but I still love them. One mother is enough for me. You know what's worse than a naggy mum who is irritable? Her mum! After all, imgaine the damage your grandmother can do to your mum as compared to what you're getting from yours.

Pass the godiva please! *sigh*

lost

2006-09-14T20:36:00.000+08:00

I can't stop this feeling deep inside of me....

That's how "Hooked On A Feeling" goes. Boy, am i hooked on a feeling. When I look back at what I write sometimes, it depresses even me.

I have got to get out of this state. Wistful, delirious, empty, lost.

Maybe its the meds. Flu meds.

Fallin'

2006-08-17T23:15:00.000+08:00

Have you ever had the sensation of falling into nothing, only to jerk up completely disorientated?

I used to get those feelings quite a bit and I've read somewhere that it means you feel insecure. Well, that's exactly how I feel now, just that I'm completely awake.

I hate the feeling. It is the feeling of falling but not having fallen. The state of unrest that just nips at you. I'm reminded of a quote from my lit text, "I'm The King of the Castle". It goes like this, "For he knew himself to be an ineffectual man...a man who had failed" but not drastically as some have done. This last part I rephrase.

I feel like I'm spiralling out of control and I know it. However, I can't break the cycle. I need an anchor, something to ground me. I need a friend, someone who would be able to reach out and dispel all these fears.

I need a true friend now, more than ever.

I'm not saying I don't have any, I just want someone to be here for me. Selfish eh?

Today, I went to the Botanical Gardens. It was sort of like fulfilling the promise I made to Rach -about bringing her to Swan Lake. When we did go, the lake was under construction and quite pituful in fact. The worst part was, that was the last time we managed to go out together for a day before she left.

I saw several swans there earlier on. There were two swans by a mum and her kids, eagerly pecking at the bread. Then there was another swan, paddling alone in the sunlight. The swan was careful not to hit any turtles. It was all alone -independent, scavanging for food. I like to think it enjoyed the freedom but it did seem a little sad.

I am that swan.

I don't get you

2006-08-13T22:15:00.000+08:00

I don't get why people chase after things in life that seem trivial to me. Why chase after valueless ideals like success or money when you could have all the wealth in your own backyard? Why aren't some people content with what they have- all they see is how much more they could get whether by force or trickery. They chase after the unattainable, forgetting about those they hurt along the way or the things of true value they had before.

As for me, I just want to be happy in life. Is that too much to ask?

I don't get why people are impressed by wealth or position. What's the point of possessing wealth and position if at the end of the day you've accomplished nothing with it? Well, the Prime Minister could come up to me and I wouldn't be impressed. Sure I would find it a tad cool but hey, anyone can become Prime Minister or President these days. Case in point- John so-not-the Majors, George Bush Jr. (enough said *roars with laughter*) and Tony whats-his-name Blair. Familiar names? I should think so but what is the point of them obtaining such office unless its to do what they were charged with. Serve the people, make policies for the better. I know it sounds way easier to effect change than it is to actually do so.

Some of the people I admire most in this age (all of you know I adore Queen E the first!) or rather one of the professions I admire most are those who are in the field of teaching. It is one of the hardest jobs in the world. In fact, it is more of a calling. I don't know if I've mentioned this before but you got to hand it to your teachers for trying to mould us day in and day out. Girl, you know that is way hard! Over the past year, I've gotten a glimpse at the harsh reality teaching involves and it truly opened my eyes. I start to realise that we do give our teachers a tough time, even in a girls school! I think they deserve our applause for bearing the scars of it all over the years. I don't know how they do it. I guess they take it one day at a time.

It is so MUCH more important what you do with that position, than the position itself. Wouldn't you agree?

Though I do admit, being the head of MDA or the National Library Board is TRE COOL! ;P

Stress

2006-07-25T23:32:00.001+08:00

Woa...everyone seems stressed and busy this period of time. I feel that way too but I can deal..I hope!

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Exams for ICP and FOM (the horror!) are in 2 weeks time. I knew I should not have skipped so many FOM lectures!

*sigh*

Its finally over

2006-07-16T22:30:00.000+08:00

Over the past month, I have been extremely busy. With the endless stream of projects, the work alone is enough to kill. Then add on rehearsals twice a week!

Finally its over~

Yesterday was amazing. Truly a rush!

I will blog about it later. For now, I need to catch up on my sleep. =j

A List

2006-06-23T18:20:00.000+08:00

Imagine if you had only 48 hours to live, what would you want to do before you die? Beyond wrapping things up, I'm sure you would wish that you had accomplished something in your life. So I made a list of what I want to accomplish in my lifetime.

1) To make a difference in someone's life

2) See Cate Blanchett and Isabelle Huppert on stage

3) Travel around Europe with friends

4) Go to New Zealand with Rai

5) Perform in the Esplanade

6) Watch the Royal Ballet at Convent Garden

7) Learn how to cook

8) Dance in the rain with someone I love

9) Watch all of Cate Blanchett's movies and the majority of Katharine Hepburn and Catherine Deneuve's films respectively

10) Have the LOTR triathalon again =j

Next I made another list of what I want to be in my life.

1) I want to be happy, content with my life like a cat is content with a saucer of full cream

2) To thine own self be true

3) Love what I do, even if it drives me crazy

4) Well-read

5) Never give up hope or let things get me down. Call it pertinacious if you will. =j

6) Able to effect change in someone's life for the better

7) To never be inhibited by society's perceptions

8) Surrounded by fresh flowers all of the time. Who needs a reason to buy flowers? =)

9) Appreciate and enjoy the simple things in life

10) Live without regrets

I sound almost dalloway-like. =)

An Ideal Husband

2006-06-14T00:21:00.000+08:00

This is passed on from Crys.

An Ideal Husband: -

Instructions: List 8 different qualities you look in a lover.

Please don't forget to mention gender seperately too.

Wanted : MALE

1. Committed Christian

2. Possesses a sense of humor and can make me laugh(preferably dark humor)

3. An incorrigible romantic

4. A good listener who can relate to me on all levels

5. Someone who can accept me and loves me for who I am, quirks and all

6. Able to give as good it gets (both figurative and literal)

7. Feels passionate about issues close to his heart

8. Does not smoke or drink

Next victims I want to pass this on to =j

1. Si Min

2. Ai

3. Rach

4. Manda

Holidays are here again

2006-06-03T19:33:00.000+08:00

*Hums* Happy days are here again! Holidays are finally here, well it is supposed to be a holiday although there are so many projects and assignments to do this month. I am SO HAPPY! I feel like a load is off my chest.

No more DTP assignment..for now! No more aerosol sprays! No more freakin' PBL! However we do have to redo the report though. School may be great but the work is going to drive me crazy one of these days. Down back in the dumps again. At least it isn't so low anymore. =)

What is a Romantic?

2006-05-18T21:17:00.000+08:00

How is one a romantic? Let me count the ways. You are one through a way of living, a way of thinking, a way of feeling. Idealistic, impulsive, incorrigible. Notice the alliteration?

Your inner romantic cannot simply be measured by the amount of tears you shed. All that proves is that you are emotional. It is in bred in you and cannot be learnt. Even if lost, it may be rediscovered again like a hidden gem.

Only a romantic will have my heart.

Life is beautiful

2006-05-18T13:44:00.000+08:00

People often say life is wonderful but a pity that there is so much wrong in this world. Finally, I have seen the light. After so many years of useless existence, i now realise that life is broken and that is precisely why life is so breathtaking. If we were to live in a perfect world, an ideal world, we as human beings would never fully appreciate what is around us.

As i wallow in misery, it intensifies what little pleasures i get from life. I'm not saying that we should go out and self-inflict complete misery though. It is because we know that we will one day die that we push ourselves beyond our comfort zone and in the process find the person that is us.

Life's imperfections are like a single grain of sand. When that sand gets into an oyster, the grain irritates it. Calcium carbonate is deposited onto its surface over time. In the end, it is made into a gorgeous pearl. We never see how our troubles not only make us stronger but more beautiful inside. At the end of our journey in life, we have produced "pearl" after "pearl", making the world a much better place.

It is life's imperfections that make it beautiful.

Busy busy

2006-04-28T20:30:00.000+08:00

I'm going to be major busy over the next month or so. With assignments, tests and projects coming in, I hope I will be able to cope.

I might admit that I am a little, ok quite insane to join 4 cca s.The Library (Club), Theatre Compass, Singapore Poly Assistant Courses and Careers Guidance, Poly Christian Fellowship.

How will I juggle everything?

Where were you last week when I called ?

2006-04-07T13:39:00.002+08:00

Been shopping like nuts the past week. I've fially found the motivation to do so. Sheesh! Most people would have done so in a snap.

I was in Melaka over the weekend. Basically got pulled along to shop along Jonker St. and I bought some cloth for a kebaya. Its going to be black, white and grey. Hope it will turn out nicely since I can't find a tailor. Anyone can recommend me one?

Off to shop some more...Hai...

Why do you still go on?

2006-03-28T14:06:00.000+08:00

Well, there is not much to update though I've been busy. Okay, I lied. Been slacking like hell, been forced to shop for clothes which I still have not done and spend my days in front of the computer or at starbucks marine parade. Right now, I'm doing both. I might as well kill two birds with one stone right? =P

Have I mentioned yet that SP is huge! I wonder how I'm going to find my way around. I said the same thing last time in TK but TK is small in comparison. Bought my laptop last week, its pretty light- weighing in at 1.65kg.Have I mentioned yet that the SP library is woa....5 stories plus a sizable dvd and cd section. Sigh...I think we all know where you can find me most of the time.

The Sonnet

2006-03-09T15:11:00.000+08:00

The Sonnet
Deliberate Gentle Love Dreamer (DGLDf)

Romantic, hopeful, and composed. You are the Sonnet. Get it? Composed? Sonnets want Love and have high ideals about it. They're conscientious people, caring & careful. You yourself have deep convictions, and you devote a lot of thought to romance and what it should be. This will frighten away most potential mates, but that's okay, because you're very choosy with your affections anyway. You'd absolutely refuse to date someone dumber than you, for instance.

Lovers who share your idealized perspective, or who are at least willing to totally throw themselves into a relationship, will be very, very happy with you. And you with them. You're already selfless and compassionate, and with the right partner, there's no doubt you can be sensual, even adventurously so. You probably have lots of female friends, and they have a special soft spot for you. Babies do, too, at the tippy-top of their baby skulls.

ALWAYS AVOID: The 5-Night Stand, The False Messiah, The Hornivore, The Last Man on Earth

CONSIDER: The Loverboy

Link: The 32-Type Dating Test by OkCupid - Free Online Dating.
My profile name: pertinacious

Just my luck!

2006-03-07T22:26:00.000+08:00

I have a terrible fate. Somehow, I always bump into teachers or I see them outside school. I mean what is wrong with my timing!

Today alone, I met/saw 3 teachers (Ms Ho, Mrs Hoe and Ms X) outside TK just when I hoped that I wouldn't. Come on! Normally, Ms X doesn't even take the bus from the stop directly opposite the side gate. She smiled widely as usual. I must admit that she has a fantastic smile though. I was mindlessly thinking that I was running late when I sub-consciously spotted Ms Ho and Mrs Hoe coming out of the side gate together chatting. What 'luck' I have! Yesterday, when I was with Si Min, we saw Ms Ho with Ms Yong at the bus stop outside school too.

That reminds me. Last Wednesday, we spent quite a delightful time with Crys and Ms Ho over dinner. I was just joking around when we were talking about Ms Ho's dinner offer the previous time. Before I knew it, I was dared to ask Ms Ho out for dinner with us at the Punggol Nasi Lemak store opposite school! I couldn't resist such a challenge and to my surprise, Ms Ho accepted our offer.

I watched "Sepet" again today but this time it was on the movie screen! I missed it when it was playing in cinemas the last time. That is why I was at the petrol kiosk outside school picking up a green tea bottle on my balance before I caught a cab. I was running late to meet Pris! So absent-mindedly I crossed the road especially after getting a shock from seeing Ms X.

In between the movie, nearing the part where Orked tries to call Jason, I realised that I couldn't tahan it any longer after drinking so much. I ran out of the theatre, without my stub. However since I asked the usher where the ladies was, I was less hesitant when I sneaked back into P.S's Golden Village theatre. Met the usher along the way after climbing under the rail on the way back. Good thing or rather I think he recognised me since he stopped what he was gonna say.

I watched "Gubra" too, on the day our Posting results were released as a sort of celebration with Raf and Si Min. Its much darker and Orked is a lil' more mature. Again, Yasmin Ahmad had to leave the movie hanging ever so slightly. Raf and I were bemoaning that fact at the end of a fantastic movie. Go watch it people!

Anyway, Pris and I enjoyed ourselves quite a bit today. To fufill my broken promise, we took neo-prints at B1. They turned out quite nicely and my hair looked really brown under the light! After that, we went for dinner at KFC (or rather I did) and we had ice-cream to top it off. It was nice to hear that my prayers for her the past few months or so have come true!

Exhausted

2006-03-05T14:49:00.000+08:00

The past 2 weeks have been crap to me. First off, I had to get the flu plus my period on the same week. If that's not bad enough, add on my LO duties. We had to basically grab the artists' food and buy stuff they needed. On the whole, it wasn't too bad though just slightly stressful. Imagine what Isis and the rest had to go through looking over the entire thing!

I also had my interviews with Nanyang and Ngee Ann Poly. The first didn't go too well I think and I scarred the second examiner for life I think. He had a nice tie though, one of Salvador Dali's work. Overall, the Ngee Ann Poly interview went well.

When results were released on Friday the 3rd of March, I found that I got into both SP and NP. However, when checking again the next day, I only got into SP. I have no idea what went wrong. Maybe I made a mistake or the Admin. Department there at NP did. I'm probably going to appeal tomorrow at NP. Hopefully I'll get in. The problem now is how to take back telling the people I told that I got into NP!

Terminal 1

2006-02-20T22:40:00.000+08:00

At Terminal 1 now and feeling Rach's void more than ever. To tell the truth, she's one of the rare few of my Pri school friends that I keep in close contact with still and be myself around her as well. Isn't it plain idiotic that some of my Pri. 6 classmates find me weird just cause of my proficiency in English? I mean normally the standard people judge by is due to being "artsy". By the way, I applied for SP's Media and Communications. I'm quite excited about it but I'm applying for Mass Communications under JPSAE as well.

I swear I'm going to strive to forget that TK library exists. Even though it's flattering what some of the sec 1 juniors refer to me as, it'll fade in time; their opinions I mean. Who gets called the pretty, pretty one often? Haha.

It was really sweet of Ms Ho to invite Si Min and me to dinner today. She asked if we wanted to eat the Nasi Lemak opposite school. You know the reputedly famous one from Pongol? I've never tried it before though.

So far

2006-02-18T14:12:00.000+08:00

What have I done so far? Basically made a fool of myself, talked to Ms Ho, got my results, seen the TK library alot and adding liason officer to my list!

The day after I posted my last hopeless entry, Ms Ho called me up to chat with me about my choices. we talked quite a bit and it was really sweet of her to help me clear up my mind. After that long talk, my mind was more or less made up and at ease all due to her. My results turned out fine too.

Lately, I've been spending my saturday mornings at Salvation Army as part of their SALE team which works with books. Coming up next will be my duties as artist liason officer for the Singapore Fringe Festival. I was supposed to look after this dance group from Chile called Isabel Croxatto but I've now been assigned to Taiwan's Riverbed Theatre. It sounds really cool.

Been going back quite a bit to the TK library. I actually miss the place! I also just found out that Ms Wati likes Ari Wibowo too! We were talking about him, Dia, Cinta Berkalang Noda and kebayas.

You know what? I still can't believe I did this on impulse. We were walking down the staircase near the GO when Si Min, Carol and I passed Ms X. I was the last one going down when I whipped around and asked Ms X if she watched Cinta Berkalang Noda. She laughed and said it was an old show which she watched on an Indonesian channel. Adding on, she said that the whole of Indonesia was going crazy over him. I replied instintively, "Ari's..*looks down to the left and bites lip to try and not smile*...nice". Then, I just couldn't help it and I smiled this goofy grin. I actually wanted to say cute.

I mean how lame is that and when I recounted to Raf, she pointed out that I was blushing! I mean I hardly blush. Anyway, Ms X giggled and went on to say that it was 5 years ago when she watched it. I told her I was just asking since I missed the past few episodes and was wondering what was going on. So I just thanked her and went on my way. I swear she was smiling widely! ;P

Rach

2006-02-01T17:28:00.000+08:00

Really miss Rach, especially after reading the post she made about me. I'm glad she liked the gift I sent her. It was so sweet of her that I just wished I could go to Edmonton now to find her. Imagine her shocked face!

Been really worried, paranoid and down lately because I'm getting more and more aware that 'O' Level results will be out soon. No matter what others say, I'm simply sceptical. I know I ought to leave all my worries in God's hands but I find myself unable to fully do so.

I have nobody to share this with who completely understands my state of mind. What if I don't do well enough to get into DMC? I know I said that I don't mind doing Early Childhood but I do ever so slightly. Plus even if I get in, where do I go from there? I absolutely have to, want to do Political Science in NUS.

Too far ahead sha...Too far ahead

Orientation

2006-01-04T22:33:00.000+08:00

Who would have guessed the year passed so fast? One blink and the year was gone- no more 'O' Levels to moan and groan about, 4e9 is no longer together and I didn't get my LOTR triathalon!

Today I went down to TK to help out with the library orientation. I was asked to all because I'm free labour and the new librarian is not too familiar with the place yet. Ms Wati seems nice though I'm not too sure yet whether she'll be like Ms Elaine or Mrs Ng.

Surprisingly I quite enjoyed my time with the sec 1s, especially after I warmed up to the task. 1E6 in particular was nice and very nosey. I think I'm coming down with a cold. Whole day long, I have been sniffling. It didn't really help when Mdm Hassan who treated me to lunch- lemon tea included, ordered lontong for me. I didn't eat the chilli that's all. Haha

Later on, I went to watch "The Family Stone" with Pris. It was pretty good. Too bad, I had to bail on Pris when she wanted to take neoprints since I felt terrible. Hai...

Mental disturbance

2005-12-11T22:06:00.000+08:00

Although I left my heart in Paris and Venice, I think I may have lost part of my soul in Florence. I don't mean that I have lost my goodness but that a certain part/facet, a particular aspect that made me whole, is either buried or resigned to circumstances beyond my one person. There are times I feel just like an empty shell going through the motions.

This so called "phase" is not new to me. However it does make me question my mental health, in terms of emotionally, though many would willingly and readily testify to the horrifying state of my being mental.

I wish I could just go away with my own thoughts. Not permanently of course!

8 easy steps

2005-12-08T14:52:00.000+08:00

I am totally in love with Alanis Morisette's songs. Particularly with "Everything", "8easy steps", "Ironic", etc. I think "Everything" is just the ultimate song I can identify with. Maybe I'm crazy.

Things are more or less settled. Rai and Renu will be coming over for the LOTR triathalon on Boxing Day, the day the Tsunami hit S-E Asia. When I get back home, I'll have to rush through my christmas shopping, on top of looking for Dorea's and Raf's birthday gifts. Maybe I'll get Raf the Jack Sparrow figurine I saw at the Disney store.

Right now, I'm on the train to Florence. It kinda reminds me of the opening scene to "Charlotte Gray". Too bad *reality check*, I'm not Cate Blanchett, not anyone could, nor am I headed towards London en route from Paris passing endless fields of blooming lavender in spring. *SIGH*

For some time, I have been mulling over what to say to Ms Ho when I get back. It is important to give that serious consideration. Maybe she can also help me to figure out which course I should take next year!

New meaning to the saying of tough as nails

2005-12-07T19:02:00.000+08:00

We walked past several churches today. One in particular had nails all over its perches, scattered even on the roof with the figurine all netted up to prevent roosting pigeons. The irony here would be that a church is meant to provide sancturary even to the unwanted.

Shopped plenty today though I don't really like to shop. Among my purchases was a stunning white mask complete with feathers, mask earrings, a beautiful blue-green glass ash tray despite the fact I abhore smoking with a passion. That is why Johnny Depp and I will never be unless he gives up chain-smoking for me. Plus I bought a black beret which totally screams bohemian. It helps me to imagine that I'm slumming it with Fred Astaire and Audrey Hepburn in Funny Face.

I wonder, how exactly does one distinguish between the genuine thing from the fake. You just don't know who really needs the money and who is taking the easy way out. I feel that it is not for us to judge. Even though some may not need our money, they deserve our pity and sympathy. They are in a worse situation, where they have given up on themselves.

Bynote: I saw my dream car today. Though it is only a model, it is definitely the same one (in terms of make) that Cary Grant drove in "To Catch A Thief".

break that bell jar

2005-12-05T19:12:00.000+08:00

Things are not always what they seem. There are times I truly believe one has to crack below the surface to discover the true situation. The mind is a wonderful and deceptive thing, your imagination and sense of romance reign especially in a place like Venice.

I would definitely love living here. The food, the people, the sights are ce'st magnifique. Beyond the fairytale lies a darker side, I don't think I could get through the winter without grieving the loss of the defenseless pigeons subject to the cruel fate from Mother Nature.

Every turn we took or so, dead birds were strewn along the streets- frozen to death. Maybe the pigeons would be warmer if they could hide somewhere, like the bell tower at St Mark's Square, think Notre Dame in Paris.

On an unrelated note, I ponder the weight 3 little words have, I love you. Who would say that to whom, in what circumstances, for what reason and what motivation. It could be prompted by brotherly/sisterly love, affection, etc. The problem daunting me is its meaning and reason behind it.

How hard can I'm sorry be?

2005-12-04T10:23:00.000+08:00

How does one say I'm sorry, let's start over? Not too easily I expect. Sometimes I feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders, I just don't feel like trudging along any more. It's precisely why I miss Rach even more. I could always moan to her, turn to her when I wanted to break down and scream my head off. She provided the reality check. Plainly put, that is what I miss most about her.

I'm writing all this at the gate before I'm off to Italy for 16 glorious days. Then why do I have this sinking feeling in my gut, tired shoulders and feeling absolutely dreary? Most girls would kill to be in my place. I know Ros would love to go and on top of that, take over from me as the library's drama queen. Too bad she has to brush up on her sacarsm. =)

I have this nagging feeling that this trip will not be uneventful or without its dramatic, high tension moments. I HATE THIS!!

Harry Potter and the Goblet of non-existent Fire

2005-12-01T18:20:00.000+08:00

Today was Ai's birthday. Happy Sweet Sixteen, Ai! So we went to watch Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire. Sad to say, I was greatly disappointed with what I saw.

Of the entire series, this book stands out as the most thrilling and is supposed to be full of spine-tingling suspense. Instead all we got were a few lame chills and nothing that really impressed us. I can't believe Dee finds this the best movie of the franchise!

After the movie, the three of us, Rai, Ai and me went window shopping a bit before looking for a pizza hut which we finally found at centrepoint. Before that, we passed a SPCA booth set up in the basement where there was construction going on I think. The whole place was shaking. Scary huh!

We also saw this charming carousel and were thinking of riding it. Of course there were the usual doubts and worrries like we're too old! But might I remind you that we are still pretty young, I mean pretty and young. Plus what if Mrs Liew or a staff member walks by when we're on it and see us? Or worse, what if the entire tk staff spots us on there? Now that would be quite embarrassing wouldn't it? We were all raring to go, only to find out there was an age limit! You mean we're OLD! Get real!

holiday life suits me

2005-11-21T16:02:00.000+08:00

Exams are almost over with only one paper left tomorrow, Science MCQ.

That brings me to the next thing coming up. Prom...Vacation..Christmas..Job...

The list is endless. Let's start off first with prom.

Prom is on Friday. I finally decided what to wear about 2 weeks ago. Not only will it save money on a dress (despite popular belief, I'm not going to the prom in a curtain a la Sound of Music), it ought to look pretty good. I'm going to "borrow" with/without consent my mum's understated orange-purple sarong and get a black top to go with it. The sarong come with a matching shawl. I'll probably wear my purple dangly earrings and my heels. Raf has oh-so kindly offered to help with makeup. You get the picture. It should be fun.

As for vacation, I'll give ya a clue. It'll be 16 glorious days in the eternal city, not all the days there though. I know it's winter but who cares. The amount of history, art and architecture make it worthwhile. Plus don't forget the gondola. Yup its Rome,Florence-Michelangelo and Leonardo DaVinci's hometown and Venice-one of the most romantic spots in the world. Who knows I might just meet a cute Italian boy there! ;P

You Belong in Rome

You're a big city girl with a small town heart

Which is why you're attracted to the romance of Rome

Strolling down picture perfect streets, cappuccino in hand

And gorgeous Italian men - could life get any better?

My job prospects look pretty good too. I might volunteer at the neccessary stage or work at popcorn part-time. There's even a slight prospect of me working in school though I doubt it. We'll just have to see what God had planned for me. Who knows? I might even end up at IMH! Working there of course,not as a patient.

*__________life could be a dream sweetheart

2005-11-19T22:21:00.000+08:00

Just a quick update.

All my papers have been pretty great except for A Maths. What else could I expect from something that's all together a different language?=P

Lit was fantastic, I was grinning all the way throughout the paper. The question we kept posing to Mrs Loe actually came out, "Were there any other options besides suicide for Kingshaw?"

Later we brought the paper to Mrs Loe, she was soo cute and all excited. Haha..We discussed the paper with her and the different sides it could have. It was really interesting. You know, if I ever taught, I probably want to teach lit.

And then there was the historic mess of crap I didn't finish. Hai..I think I totally messed up my history. What am i going to do? I did a pretty good SBQ and then SEQ just sucked plainly. My first part on Mao's reasons for cultural revolution were 4 factors alright but were either weak or average i think. My part2 had only an overview and elaboration of my first point. It sounds bad I know. Rai cheered me up quite abit. Raf too.

To add on to the misery, I lost my specs when I ran across the junction to tjc. It was raining so hard. So yeah, Raf and I didn't have an umbrella that day, the one day I didn't bring my umbrella. That brings me to another rant, why does it always rain when I forget my umbrella. I should just run the weather station. Though honestly I never do bring it since I'm too lazy. The above is just my official excuse. Anyway back to my previous point, as I hung my specs on my pinafore and took that fateful run, how would I anticipate that I would lose my specs?

Anyway, I went back into the rain to look for them and even when it stopped raining, but I could not find them. All i got was soaked to the bone. So Raf "dragged" me to the SC room in tj to get a skirt so I could change out of my wet uniform. After telling the guard that I was an exchange student for library which sounds quite ridiculous I admit-Raf's idea but the only one we had, we were home free. In a library tee and tj skirt, I can tell ya that the skirt is way comfy.

It was the only one they had. Raf and i could squeeze into it without a problem, the difficulty was hooking it. After much difficulty, Raf finally hooked it up and I borrowed her skirt. I just love the tjc campus. Its so nice, hope Mrs Loke-Yeo doesn't change it much.

After the whole drama, we went to make a new pair of specs for me. Along the way,feeling kinda crazy, we sent weird/crazy messages to Beeny. Haha..The poor boy is probably stunned. Oh well..

Tomorrow, I'll be going to Lydia's house. Finally decided on what to wear with some help from Raf. Going to wear black pants and a pink kebaya with perhaps, chopsticks in my hair. Hope that works out. I already bought white roses to bring over.

That brings me to now...with my dark green rectangle-framed specs.

Ramadan

2005-10-30T15:25:00.000+08:00

If you've ever stayed in S'pore, you'll probably know a little at least about Ramadan. No, its not a man, it's more of a period when the Malays fast for about a month. Its way more than that but that's about the best decription I can give you.

Anyway, though it's been great eating dinner with my friends, it's a bit hard sometimes to remember it's not time to buka(break fast) yet.

Bit random I know but since Ramadan will be over soon, it'll be great to be able to eat with my friends at any time we want to now. No longer restricted, we can now go out for lunch together soon. Yea!

But I know I'll miss those dinners with Raf and Ai though..

My life so far..

2005-10-25T20:03:00.000+08:00

Ok..I'm officially 16!

But why do i not feel much different?

I mean I can now legally open a pool table, which I already do on the sly.I do not have to sneak into a nc-16 film, not that I do, but no more grumbling about how the movie grading system is way unfair, preventing me from seeing Veronica Guerin and Coffee & Cigarettes in the movie theatre.

I just don't know.

Anyway, I have a great theory that it's due to the amount of intense *I like to think so* studying that I've been doing for Prelims and the upcoming 'O' levels. It has aged me way much but definitely not too much as I still act like a kid at time, a crazy kid. Loved that study session we had at the airport on the 6th of Sept, the one with Ai and Rai. We may not have covered the whole book but we covered a lot and laughed a great deal more. Those memories are precious.

Like when I got Rach's present all the way from that weird place, Canada *kidding about the weird, not about Canada so don't go all patriotic on me Rach*.It was so sweet, I nearly cried. Miss ya gurl.

Best to snap back to reality now especially since my practical on the 22nd sucked so much...

X-country

2005-08-27T11:42:00.000+08:00

The 26th was Cross Country and our theme this year for Zany Parade was "Cool".At first our class couldn't decide on what to go as. There were talks of chlorine atoms by 4e2-go figure. Definitely triple science material as they claim vectors CO+OL=CL; which is chlorine, going cool as cucumbers from 4e1, hippie grandparents by 4e7 which is more or less a reprisal of their grandparents act last year. Our suggestions were nuns from "Sister Act", rock stars, hawaiian hula girls with coconut bras, matrix etc. Finally we decided on hip-hop which is not a good thing for me since I'm definitely not into it.

On that day itself, Ai and I went to Parkway to eat lunch. As we were at the taxi queue, we met met Si Min and her classmates. Si Min hitched a ride with us as her group was one person too big to fit in a cab. It turns out that 4e6 was going as drinks completely with bendy straws and everything. Chaos ruled when we reached ECP. There were teapots and teacups with lipton tea bags running around in black tees under the HOT sun. Those people were from 4e7. 4e2 decided to go as themselves which is a letdown since it would have been nice to remember them as the Chlorine atom class.

Our own item was slightly messed up, it being last minute and all. Ms X was so funny. She came up to one of the girls and told her that our class tee, "tempted to touch..... my nose", was offensive. Sorry, I just have to laugh my head off. Hahahahaha...

But 4e9 rocks. Our class just plain rocks and Mrs Geh turned up to give moral support on her blades. That reminds me, I want to go blading some time soon. Too bad, Mrs Geh didn't keep the "Saturday Night Fever" pose for us when Ying Lin whipped out her camera. Ms Ann was the judge, it being her last official day with TK before she moves to Germany for her Masters. I'm so jealous, she'll be there for the World Cup! But Ms Ann was really cute later on, she asked me if that whole get-up was my alter-ego. Too bad she'll never know...=P

We also decided to show Mdm Hassan this small picture of Bae Yong Joon in I-weekly. She was so excited! Mdm Hassan later claimed that to help us, she would have to confiscate that magazine even though she can't understand what was written about him, as our prelims are around the corner. So cute sia..reminds me of how she's been hinting to her classes about Teachers' Day and her wanting chocs and kropok. By the way, it turns out she had my cd all this while since May! She had forgotten that she had it after claiming that she had returned it earlier.

4e9 went really nuts as we were walking back to the field. We were all cheering and some annoying sec1s copied us shouting 'Spongebob Squarepants'.I mean hello, GET A LIFE! So we just shouted louder and when we passed Ms Hamidah, we shouted "Mao Ze Dong" and I think "SEQ"....haha..that was so lame. We later passed Mdm Azzizan where we shouted "SBQ" and she actually recorded us. So cute sia...The funniest was when we passed Ms Johara and we yelled Physics and A1..That was freakin' lame and we all just kept laughing our heads off.

Took plenty of photos again. I think any school event is a good excuse for a photo op. I was like posing with this ice cream stick which I was too lazy to throw away. Haha..So my photos with Nad,Manda-Panda and Henna have that ice cream stick. Hey,I was treated to ice cream by Si Min or was it Yi Jin?

After x-country, Ai and I went to Marina Cove to get some dinner. We walked sooooo long and I kept checking to see if we passed so and so school. Finally we reached there and ate at Gelare. Too bad we couldn't finish the strawberry sundae but boy was it good.=D

Arab Street

2005-08-18T20:58:00.000+08:00

Went to Arab St. today with Ai to get a basket for Mdm Hassan's Teachers' Day gift. The sec4 librarians are banding together to get Ms Yati as she supposedly likes to be called, a picnic basket full of goodies-chocs, kropok, hot and spicy chips, Bae Yong Joon-a picture of course. I don't think we can fit the poor man into the basket even if we chopped him up.

Its really quite a nice basket though slightly on the expensive side. Its this rather unique gold basket that opens up without the handle sticking out. After getting the basket and planning to shop here again after Hari Raya, Ai and I went to eat Murtabak.

It was pretty good and I think the guy undercharged us by at least $2. Maybe it was due to our magnetic personality inducing a change in magnetic flux. Crikes! I have been studying Physics too much.

Past week or so, Ai and I've been quoting lines from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Quite funny in the beginning but I think people are getting real sick of it now. Haha..

"Everything in this room is eatable.Even I'm eatable but that is called cannibalism,my dear childrenAnd is frowned upon in most societies."

"Good morning starshine.The earth says hello."

National Day

2005-08-09T10:31:00.000+08:00

Yesterday rocked. All of us dressed up, me in my mum's pink kebaya..ai in the yukata manda,rai and I pitched in to get etc..Nad wore her Hari Raya clothes which was really nice,all silvery like she's going for a wedding. Turns out she's going to take the white dress underneath it for prom..haha. It was quite cool I guess but I think there's something seriously wrong with the concert organiser.

I mean hello...does the word NATIONAL mean anything to you. This is not CNY! Wake up! The entire concert was full of chinese items with the exception of the Indonesian and the Filipino-Thai piece. I'm sorry but why put on only a Chinese opera but not wayang kulit. Most of the items were rather dots...

The Filipino-Thai song piece was awesome. That girl has a lovely voice. They definitely should perform more often. The Indonesian dance was great too, everyone really enjoyed that especially Ms Hamidah, judging from her expression. I mean that type of grace is a bit hard to find.

After that, a group of us went out to watch a movie. Ai, Rai, Alison, Renuka, Yu Lin, Qi, Christy...Orginally it was just meant to be Rai, Yu Lin and me.But you know, the more the merrier.

Charlie and The Chocolate Factory rocks! I laughed non-stop throughout the show I think and we were sitting in the front rows. Good thing it was at Marina and not at Tampines. The oompa-loompas were really hilarious and the song-dance ROTFL.

Went back to school on a whim after that. Don't know what I was thinking but I wanted to get my photo album from the library. The side gate was locked, so I went to the main gate, then I lost my dutch courage after seeing the guards there. So I kinda hopped-walked back to the bus stop across the main gate where I missed my bus while I was still on the overhead bridge. Its not easy walking in someone else's sarong while you have a rigged ankle! I had to constantly make sure my sarong covered the bandage.

While I was waiting, Ms X came out from school. She was trying to hail a cab to no avail and then she jaywalked across. I was praying so hard that she would not come over to the bus stop where I was. Thank God she didn't. She just disappeared.

I got tired of waiting and decided it would be so much easier to take the MRT home. All I had to do was walk over to the other side. While I was "walking there" my mum called to yell at me for not being home yet. Come on, it was only 4.30 or so. Its not the easiest thing in the world I can tell you to be struggling to walk while keeping your sarong from flying on heels when you sprained your ankle as you're being yelled at. My mum didn't believe that I was by the road as the normally busy road was quite deserted that day. Shucks, what luck!

To make things worse, after I got off the phone and reached the bus stop, guess who was there? Ms X! Why wouldn't someone just kill me? It turns out she decided to walk over to the bus stop too and she could see me from there since the time I was crossing the road. Crikes! How embarrassing sia...

Raidah says, its like having 10 cute guys watching you as you repeat that all over again. At least out of the 10, I would think that a few would find it adorable at least. Anyway, Ms X just said,"Hi Jerusha" and smiled real wide as if she was amused. Kinda weakly, I just smiled back and mouthed, "Hi".135 couldn't come fast enough!

When the bus came, I hopped up rather quickly considering my ankle and the sarong. Before that, she just said "Bye Jerusha" and smiled again. So I said Bye and smiled too. Such an anticlimax to a geat day!

The whole group of us took so many pics today...can't wait to develop them

semi-sweet and nuts

2005-08-09T10:30:00.000+08:00

History and SS

2005-07-20T22:24:00.000+08:00

Oh crap..I feel like such a failure. After what Ms Hamidah talked about and on how disappointed she is, it really hit me. I've been slacking like mad. I feel so horrid after what she said. Is this amount of self-loathing normal?

Been trying so hard recently only to find its not enough. I can give more, sacrifice more to do well and get into the course I want. For goodness sake, my bedside reading is GCSE Physics! How more geek-like do you want me to be?

I know its not about studying hard but studying smart. Just tell me how!

quiz time!!!

2005-07-05T21:32:00.000+08:00

Seduction ALERT!!!
You are 88% Seductive!

Well! You definitely
know seduction! Even if you're pretty average-looking,
you seem to be able to wrap at least a few people
around your little finger, and get what you want
in the long-run. You may even have had to deal with
some unpleasant situations involving obsessive people,
paranoid lovers, or creepy secret admirers... All in
all though, you have probably enjoyed your 'abilities'!

Just be careful - There's a thin line between
seductiveness and manipulation! You may be taking
advantage of others without realizing it, just because
they seem so willing to make you happy. Or you may like
to seduce others just to see if you can - instead
of being genuinely attracted to them. That's the kind of
stuff that ticks people off! If you aren't sufficiently
aware of your persuasive powers (or use them too selfishly),
a LOT of people may grow resentful of you in time, and
- rightfully - decide to move against you.

If your intentions are indeed more benevolent than self-serving,
you could do very well in a career where you can
influence bigwigs with your words or writing.

Enjoy your seductiveness (as you no doubt do), but don't
forget the needs of others.

Use those powers wisely!

Swan Lake was just quackin' good

2005-06-25T13:02:00.000+08:00

Watched Swan Lake last night. Normally I try not to swear but it was OMG!!! I think I'm in love with the whole production. The music and the set has been in my head all day. It was amazing!!!
The dancing was really superb and I could only find one fault. There was this freakin' annoying guy who kept blocking my view with his fat head! As if to cover all bases, his entire family had big heads. That guy who was in front of me kept moving non-stop, so whenever I found a hole that I could look through, he moved his head and blocked it. Its like he has an inbuilt radar blocking system in that thick skull of his!

Anyway back to The Royal Ballet, I can now see why reviews for the SDT weren't so hot in London. With dancers like this, enough said. I mean the SDT is great, the absolute best dance company in the region to me for ballet but The Royal Ballet brings it to a whole new level. The entire production was flawless. The dancing was precise and fluidly executed. Stage presence could be felt and the sets designed were absolutely BREATHTAKING!

The designer who's a genius I might add used a layering design to acheive a very effect that only added to the ballet. There was great detail and painstaking planning put in it. The mirrors used in the ball scene (act 3 i think) were stunning. The way the designer used the metal for such an intricate design just left me speechless. Backdrops were absolutely, without a doubt lovely. In Act 1, the whole feel was very Russian, as if it was a tribute to the great composer, Tchaikovsky who composed such great music for Swan Lake. Even the colours used were given thought. Bright colours were used for the court scene so as to give a very gay and lively atmosphere for the set dances. The costumes were gorgeous. The stark difference in colour for Odette and Odile's costumes playing up to the difference in their nature was a stroke of genius though i might add unoriginal. One small detail even if insignificant bugged me slightly. The cygnet and swan costumes could have been improved upon. But who can blame the designer for such a small oversight, it would be simply petty...

Swan Lake

2005-06-25T13:01:00.000+08:00

Down Under

2005-06-20T12:57:00.000+08:00

Man, I could stay here forever! Okay, not forever but at least until 'O' Levels ends in November. That kinda rhymes, I got to get a life. Judging from the title, you could probably tell that I'm currently in Australia!

Currently reporting from Gold Coast, with my family and it's been great so far. We did all the tourist-y stuff AGAIN, besides a ton of shopping which was quite fine for me. I'm starting to think that my shopping allergy is dying down....

That's more or less about it. Just thought of an update, a short one but an update nonetheless. *moan*. The only downside is studying for the stupid BLOCK CAS!!!

How embarrassed can one get?

2005-06-03T14:18:00.000+08:00

I'm majorly embarrassed. Yesterday, the sec 4 librarians had our own farewell at the Pizza Hut outlet at P.S. All of us looked pretty good if I may say so myself, very different from how we looked in school uniform. Anyway, I made such a fool of myself...

It all started when Ms Elaine refused to give us the bill. She then hid the bill in what looked like this white bag. So, I climbed under the table and grabbed it since it was opposite me. After "kidnapping" the bag, I took out the bill. Lydia grabbed it and realised it was the ...WRONG bill. Oops..

It was actually the bill for a cake from Angie's the Choice where the teachers had bought us a cake to celebrate. Ahhhhhhhhhh...

If I could blush, I would have been so red as i went under the table and put the bag back. To make things worse, the first time i came out from under the table, I knocked my head.It was such a funny sight that all of us were laughing. Renuka said I should do that under table knock head thing again..hahax...

When Ms Ho arrived, things just got more festive. In the middle of the meal, Ms Ho announced that she was not thin. All of us nearly exploded when we heard that.Mdm Hassan was rolling her eyes-can't blame her since Ms Ho is SO thin. Renuka told her, "Ms Ho, if you're not thin then what are we?" which brought much laughter around the whole table.

As we neared the end of the meal, we begged Ms Elaine to give us the bill which she promise earlier to hand over when we finished. Of course, she refused to since the teachers wanted to pay. The teachers conferred over the bill whilst Ms Ho held up a napkin to prevent us from seeing the cost- which looked VERY funny by the way...

Since we could not get to it, we did the next best thing. I went to the counter to ask for a copy. After which, I called Si Min over to pay. TRIUMPH at last...

As Si Min paid the man, I tapped Ms Ho's shoulder and she turned around asking, "What are you doing here behind us?", sounding slightly shocked. We returned to the table explaining that we just paid the bill at the counter. All of us couldn't help but laugh especially after the teacher's efforts to prevent us from doing so. They however had the last laugh in the end. Not only did they give us the cake, they managed to wear us down into accepting their money to pay for a huge part of the meal! All our efforts went down the drain...

It was a good meal though...

P.S. The bag turned out to be Mdm Hassan's. All the librarians including me gasped in shock. Eep!..To look on the bright side, now i know Mdm Hassan has really nice taste in bags...

may the force be with you...

2005-06-01T19:17:00.000+08:00

Went to watch Star Wars: episode 3 today with Ai. It was so freakin' cool. Especially the part where Obi-Wan (Ewan McGregor) and Anakin (Hayden Christensen) fought, it just leaves you speechless. Of course it was a bit retarded when Darth Vader/ Anakin found out about Padme's death and was crying out nooo...

We were nearly late too. It was all due to Mrs Loe suddenly deciding that she wanted to wrap up the whole thing and finish 'I'm The King of The Castle' on that very day since we were at the last chapter. Blame partly goes to me too, cause I had to find Ms X to see if she could make it for the sec 4 library farewell at PS tomorrow. It turns out she forgot about it and couldn't make it. That's really too bad but i know Renuka will definitely be happy to hear this.

Anyway, I had to rush after Ms X to ask her all for nothing and wasted even more precious time. Thankfully, we made it just in the nick of time and got into a super empty theatre almost right before the start of the show. Now, I can see why there are so many Star Wars fans. Yoda's duel with Chancellor Palpatine alone was worth every cent of the ticket price and when Padme told Anakin that he had changed, it was like you could almost hear her heart breaking. Too bad I'm not a huge fan of Natalie Portman...

After the movie, Ai and I just wandered around Marina Square which is under construction and we went to the movie shop as well. When we were in Marina, something funny happened. Whilst we were in this vcd shop, we discovered to our horror that we had left a trail of salty popcorn and sugar peanuts-courtesy of moi,threw them in during the movie and we spent alot of time digging around for them. Quickly, we got on our knees to scoop up our trail of food and could not stop laughing no matter how much we tried. It was so funny when Ai saw the trail, her expression was priceless. There was non-stop giggling the whole time we were cleaning up. Did I mention we were in our uniforms? After our conscience was appeased, we hurridly got out of there. When we passed by the same shop again, Ai couldn't help but look away. We just kept laughing...

Yoda

2005-06-01T19:16:00.003+08:00

Jedi Match

2005-06-01T19:16:00.002+08:00

~Its over..lets pop the champagne !

2005-05-31T13:07:00.000+08:00

Finally Chinese 'O' levels are over. Life has gone back to normal...i think.

Watched 50 First Dates in the computer lab with Raidah yesterday. It was real fun except for the fact that there were some girls in there too making a huge amount of noise. I'm starting to sound crazy but I would have loved to set Ms X on them to shut them up. Must be the excessive studying getting to me.

After that, Raidah and I went around town trying to find a movie theatre showing that new Jane Fonda flick, Monster-In-Law. We found several alright but none that was playing at a good time. They were either screened too early or too late. Sheesh!

So Raidah and I walked around aimlessly for some time. Then we sat down and ate our BK burgers at Millenia Walk. On some idea we got into our heads, we walked to the esplanade where we went to the library, movie shop and then rounded it up with a big ice-cream sundae which we shared.

What a GREAT waste of a day..haha

Chinese 'O' Levels are coming !!!

2005-05-21T17:55:00.000+08:00

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. Only 8 more days to Chinese 'O's. I've been studying like mad past few weeks or so but why do i still find that its not enough. When is enough?

Breathe, I have to keep telling myself. But how can I when everything's in full panic, hit the red button, the world is going to end soon alert. I can tell practically everyone to chill but it doesn't seem to work for me. My whole nerval system is breaking down.

WHAT AM I GOING TO DO PEOPLE??????

Ok calm down, don't listen to those voices inside your head that says everything will fall apart and collapse, ruining the short miserable life that you call an existence.

I'm calm, repeat after me. I'm calm. The world is not ending-technically it is since george bush jr got elected back into office again. I'm calm. Nothing can touch me. I'm calm....

Element test again..but i think this is way more accurate...

2005-05-16T12:32:00.000+08:00

Your element is Fire: Strong, hot tempered,
powerful, and passionate. Well now lets see,
being fire you are quite strong and powerful,
people look up to you greatly and often seek
your protection. You have the ability to gain
many friends and you are always one people can
count on to do what you say you will do. You
are extremely loyal be it friends or family
you'll stick up for them and you are never
willing to put them in a position that could
hurt them. You know what roll you play in life,
leader, and you intend to let people know it.
Not everyone is capable of leadership but you
certainly have the willpower and flare to do
it. You have quite a temper if it shows itself,
one that can often lead you into trouble. Once
your mind is made up there is no changing it
but no one said that was a bad thing.

.:-What is your true element?-:. -With Anime Pictures and detailed answers-
brought to you by Quizilla

Sec4 farewell

2005-05-07T19:56:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, we had Sec4 farewell for the librarians. It was quite fun and we all acted crazy *like usual*...

We were all quited bummed out earlier on due to the fact that we were SO pathetic that we had to plan our own farewell. So Lydia dropped a huge "hint". It went like this, "juniors, do you know we sec4s are so pathetic that we have to plan our own farewell, ahem ahem". It makes us sound SO despo. But honestly, even if they didn't throw us a farewell, I would not have minded anyway. Course we all know how hard we worked to make the library what it is...

Anyway, a huge THANK YOU should go out to ultra sweet GEK TENG and DAPHNE who planned a farewell for us. Thanks you two*muackz*. You guys rock. Can always count on you two. Its so obvious that they are in general comm. Hehe. Look Lydia, my general comm is so much better than yours. Si Min, it goes without saying, deco and general beats promo hands down anyday..=P

We had satay, pizza, sandwiches, jelly-made specially by Ms Ho *delish btw, you should open a jelly counter Ms Ho* etc. And who could forget that lovely, heavenly, rich chocolate cake. It looked almost too good to eat, keyword being almost. I had to beg the guy the night before to bake it. With much persuasion and shameless pleading, he gave in. Such an angel don't you think? It definitely helped to look at him with puppy dog eyes. After cake cutting, Gek Teng and I had a green tea drinking contest. I won of course but with dubious rewards. We felt so full and nauseous. Plus we had to go and deliver a slice to Ms X. We dragged our bloated carcasses up, only to find her gone.Hai...

What would an event be without..pictures of course! We took alot of siao pictures so that we could remember that day. In order to complete the sec4 group, we had to get Renuka who was having interact club. I went to get her at 1e7 classroom. Suddenly i remembered i had a pizza crust in my hand, so i had to stuff it into my mouth-most of it fyi. I wasn't even done yet when i reached the door. Sheesh..panic attack. To end a long story short, I managed to get Renuka out and somehow interrupted an important meeting.

We had a wicked time posing for pictures. To top it off, we had an ice war. I managed to put an ice cube down Roslyn's back. She screamed. Managed to catch her offguard while she was speaking to the juniors as she kinda guessed earlier what i was going to do. So i pretended to walk away and she let her guard down. I got "iced" one,two times myself. But I managed to get my revenge unlike poor Roslyn *who didn't get me back..haha*who also was the target of just about everybody. By the way, I still say that I'm so NOT photogenic...

2005-05-07T19:55:00.000+08:00

yipee i'm finally tall !!

2005-05-07T19:52:00.000+08:00

another plane

2005-05-07T19:51:00.000+08:00

Sir Saba Raffles

2005-05-07T19:50:00.000+08:00

around the cake

2005-05-07T19:49:00.000+08:00

choc cake which we had to order ourselves

2005-05-07T19:48:00.000+08:00

drooling all over the cake

2005-05-07T19:47:00.000+08:00

look at us..the supermodels

2005-05-07T19:46:00.000+08:00

cutting the cake

2005-05-07T19:45:00.000+08:00

trying to make the cut